Saturday, December 9, 2017

Just a Little Help

Here's where I am in life right now.

Job accepted at a bigger park. 1.5 hour communte, like 60 miles away. $10 an hour. I did the math, and at this point, after all the deductions, I'll be bringing home (to pay bills with) $30 more week than what I currently do on unemployment.  Job Before, no benefits, no deductions, seasonal only. Bring home pay around $340 a week. Now, bring home pay about $250 a week. insurance, retirement, full time. year round.  Beggars can't be chosers, and some work is better than no work. Fine, I'll do it. Get 1st paycheck in a month.

Hubs is now in the process of getting his teaching license. Has job offer substituting. $90 licensing fees. Will be called at 5am for assignments to any school within our county. Can't start working until those are paid.


Now,  big problem. 1 car. Car that is not up to such a long commute everyday for me due to age, and the snow where I'll be working. Big mountains to cross. Tiny car. And it's my 30th birthday, which means my drivers license is expired.


Financial situation. Storage is about to be auctioned off. (that's where I keep all our stuff since we live with his parents ) Cell Phones are disconnected. My school bill is a month past due. His bills are 2 months past due. Car tire bill is 3 months past. Total moneys needed to bring all current. $900.

Need second car.
Need to keep these jobs.
Need to not lose everything we own.
Need not to be kicked out (which I get the feeling we are close to being)

If we can make it through the next few months, we will be on a path to better things, like stability.

Getting through will probably be one of the biggest hurdles we've ever faced. Cause there's hope at the end. When we became homeless before, we had no hope. Now we can see the path. and all these hurdles seem so much higher to jump.

How do people make it with no outside help? It's fucking hard.

I'm looking at using the bus to get to work so hubs can use the car for his job. I'm looking at a 3 hour commute in the mornings and no return trip. (busses stop at 7, and I'll be getting off work at 7:30-8)

Monday, July 31, 2017

Dealing with Death

Dealing with death or impending death of a loved one while also dealing with your own mind can be it's own special kind of torment.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017


I've struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts (and sometimes actions) for 16 years now. It's not a widely known issue for me. I tend to keep all this bottled up and then sometimes posted on this blog, never on my social media accounts.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

The Misadventures of Going Into Business with Family

One big life goal of mine is to own my own business. A legit brick and mortar shop shop.

Mission accomplished. I went into business with my mother and opened a local home decor shop. And it's been one big horrible mistake.

Monday, January 23, 2017

It's been a bad day

I have never wanted to drive headfirst into a telephone pole more in my life than I want to today.

Just a Little Help

Here's where I am in life right now. Job accepted at a bigger park. 1.5 hour communte, like 60 miles away. $10 an hour. I did the math,...